February 20, 2024

San Franciscans Continue Crapping In The Street In Honor Of 49ers Crapping The Bed

LAS VEGAS — San Franciscans continued crapping in the streets to honor the incredible way in which the 49ers so epically crapped the bed.

“This is what we deserve!!” shouted Christian McCaffrey as he dumped an entire jug of poo onto Coach Kyle Shanahan. “This is what it means to be San Francisco!”

All across San Francisco, citizens joined in letting out their rage by running out into the streets and flinging poo into the air. Widespread looting, arson, and gunfire were reported throughout the city, leaving police relieved that nothing was out of the ordinary.

At publishing time, the city had announced the defeated team would be welcomed home with a ticker tape poo parade.

By now the whole internet has heard Ben Shapiro rapping, but did you know that there are actually two more verses they cut out of the track?

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