Arizona Indicts Trump Allies For Questioning Election Results While Republican

PHOENIX, AZ — The aftereffects of the hotly contested 2020 presidential election continued to be felt in a key battleground state, as Arizona Trump allies were indicted on charges of questioning election results while Republican.

The serious charge, not to be confused with the completely legal practice of questioning election results while Democrat, carries significant penalties for the individuals indicted. State authorities sought to make an example of them to act as a deterrent to anyone else who may entertain the notion that Republicans could ever question election results under any circumstances.

“This is a crime that cannot be tolerated,” said Arizona Attorney General Kris Mayes when announcing the indictments. “For these individuals to have the audacity to question our election results while being Republicans, it’s an unconscionable affront to democracy itself. They will be held accountable so that election results can only be questioned by Democrats, as it should be.”

When asked for clarification on why Republicans are not allowed to dispute the results of an election while Democrats are, Mayes issued a sober warning. “Are you questioning this?” she asked the reporter. “Are you? Are you questioning our authority to determine who can question things? If you are, you’ll be in big trouble. Wait, are you a Republican? You are? Ok, yeah, you better not question anything. I’m serious. I’ll indict you right now.”

At publishing time, the Trump allies facing the indictment were reportedly considering changing their party affiliations to Democrat to have the charges dropped.

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